Dear The-Best-Butcher-In-The-Whole-World:
Just STOP it already, will ya? Smile at this. Smile at that. Does it ever end? Have you not driven Main Street lately? Don’t you know about all of the misery across the planet?
Ya know, the dreary weather, the price of chicken wings, the upcoming one-hour loss of sleep, and all those damn crooks in Congress? There are those potholes, taxes, cracked windshields, cold soup, stale bread, and speeding tickets, and let’s not forget adult acne, colonoscopies, flat tires, gray hair, and the flu.
M-I-S-E-R-Y!
But none of the world’s yuckiness seems to matter with you – now does it?!? – because every single time we step into your store, there ya are, smiling at someone somewhere. You’re going to hurt yourself, ya know that? No, we swear, it’s called “Perma-Grin” and it’s purty painful. Cheeks hurt, wrinkles run deep …
But seriously, what are ya, one of those “lemons into lemonade” people?
What’s that? You are? Oh. And it’s fun? Fun? People smile back at you? They say “Hi” sometimes, too?
Well, um, that actually sounds really nice. Hmm.
Ahh, yeah, Dave, forget what we were saying, OK? And, ah, thanks, Dave. Good talk, good talk.
Sincerely,
Back to Smiling Back
