She didn’t like the order of the questions as presented. Sure, she’d love to participate. Sure, send the questions. Sure, when I have time to get to them.
Sure, and gosh, she really loves the casualness of the other question-and-answer essays on LEDE, so, yeah, sure.
But when Carrie Eller decided to tackle the inquiries, she refused to comply and reply in the normal one-to-five order. Instead, she chose a this-one-here-and-that-one-down-there order, and that’s because that made her happy. It’s about being balanced and intentional when it comes to living the way you wish.
That’s what Eller does in life, and that’s what she does for a living with her creation called Under the Elder Tree in Wheeling’s Centre Market. It is an apothecary and healing arts centre that features massage, a salt sanctuary, herbs and teas and tinctures, as well as incense and candles and jewels – and a hell of a lot of know-how, too.
Eller lived differently at younger ages. She wasn’t as kind to her body or her soul back then as she is now. Lessons learned. Priorities set. And what’s the top priority?
Happiness, what else? That’s why what follows is in Eller’s order and no one else’s.
ONE. What food item did you serve that was most popular as a server at Zein’s?
Oh geez, it’s been 18 years since I worked there. (I was there 10 years though … I started when I was 20, and quit a few weeks before my second son was born – and he just turned 18 a couple of weeks ago!
Zein’s had soooo many popular dishes, and they ran great specials. But I distinctly remember serving the Ribeye steaks. They came on sizzle platters and it was a whole sensory experience delivering that to a table. They could hear the dinner coming from across the room and I loved the anticipation you’d see in their faces. And nobody made a steak like Zien’s! In all my years since, I have yet to find an equal.
FOUR. What SHOULD have been your nickname as a kid?
I’ve had a few. Hmmmmm.
“BOOKWORM.” My life revolved around books. I always had my head buried in one and I never was caught without one on my person. That was even my first internet password when the internet became a thing in my early teen years (gosh I’m showing my age here).
“Princess Margaret” was one my mother had for me. I had a lot of sensory issues, so I didn’t allow my parents to touch me, and I was very aloof to keep people at a tolerable/comfortable distance from me.
So, it was taken as me being uppity and got me the regal moniker.
THREE. Why do you believe you have the clientele that you have today?
I believe I have the clientele because I’m relatable and because I truly care. I am blessed to have so much support from the community, but it’s a symbiotic relationship in that we help each other out. I listen to what people need to say. I hear, and I offer help and guidance in what direction they are needing. And I don’t put myself on a pedestal as some sort of guru above them.
I’m right down there with my clients. I struggle too. I have my own issues, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. Heck, my business wouldn’t even exist if I hadn’t abused my body so badly with drugs when I was young. I destroyed myself! And I used my lifetime of study to build it back up.
I’m passionate about sharing that knowledge to help others on their own path too. I was instilled with such a sense of duty and obligation to others as a child – we are our brother’s keeper.
A bible verse that always comes to me is, “To whom much is given, much is required.”
I absolutely believe I’m meant/ obligated to share all this massive knowledge I have acquired over my lifetime. To keep it to myself and not help others with it would be shameful. Even when my sensory issues make me have a hard time dealing with people, I still power through and share it the best I can. It’s truly my mission in life.
FIVE. Please define what you mean by “intentional and balanced life.”
I’ve been in the “helping others” business for quite a long while now (22 years massaging and nine years with my brick and mortar location), and this long amount of time has allowed me to see common patterns over and over in what people are asking for in terms of help. Often, we are victims of our life circumstances. Meaning, by default we just allow things to happen. But we actually can choose how we want to feel, how we want to react, and how we want to live. We can live with intention!
You want to be happy? Don’t wait for Happy to drop in your lap. It doesn’t happen like that. Choose to notice the small bits of good things that surround you. Choose to focus on the pieces that amplify the positives. The more you do that, the more making a different focus point becomes a good habit and the more you will draw happiness to you like a magnet. Yes, good and bad things will happen to us all … it’s all part of the human experience, but our focus and reactions are where we have the ability to make intentions that can change how we interact with our world and change our reactions.
That’s living intentionally.
And, after many years of helping others with this, one of the main recurring themes is balance. I could go off on a huge tangent here about how our society and the way we live is hideously out of balance and extremely stressful. We put so much pressure on ourselves to attain, get more, do more, and we run ourselves ragged. And so many come in looking for help with how to cope with the stress of it all.
Society needs to slow down and change, but, until we start realizing that, we need help mentally and physically dealing with the burden of existing in our Western society. So, when I say I help others live an “Intentional & Balanced Life,” I literally help others choose to be more proactive in choosing how they perceive things, and help them choose ways of reacting and living that allow them to be a bit more in balance rather than in a state of chronic stress. And this segues into question #2.
AND TWO. Have you ever been accused of mixing magic potions?
With all the herb jars all over my walls, I always get the little jabs and jokes about what sorts of things we are mixing up here. And we cackle and tell them we keep the eye of newt under the counter. It’s all part of a fun experience and banter in the shop.
Have I heard rumors of people who accuse me of doing things “of a darker nature?” Of course. People attack what they don’t understand. But I know my heart, and God does too, so I’ve learned not to let it bother me. And in spite of their judgment, I keep plugging along every day of my life to help others to the best of my ability. I wasn’t given this driving need to read and acquire knowledge for nothing. It was all part of some greater plan.
I’ll circle my answer back to the intention and balanced idea. As I mentioned, people come in wanting help coping with their life issues. And what I have is a shop full of elements that represent the change they wish to make.
Take happiness, for example again, golden colored herbs and stones are representative of feeling happy. There are scents from those herbs that will help physically evoke those feelings. So, maybe I will mix up their own personal perfume that has the stones and scents and herbs that all embody happiness for them.
When they roll it on, do the ingredients make them happy? Not really. They can help but what they do is remind you to choose happiness. The choice and the action are inside of you. You have the power to make the changes you want and the ingredients just reinforce your own desires.
Is that mixing up magic potions? Some may say so, but what I’m actually serving up is hope, and the confidence for people to take control of their own lives and make the little changes to live more in alignment with how they want.
