I had finished my speech and headed back to my spot beside the bus, making sure that I stopped to make eye contact with her before turning my back on her. When I reached the bus, limping because of my sciatica, I turned around in time to hear someone say, “Oh no! What happened to her?” I heard myself exclaim, “Oh shit! That’s my kid!” and I took off up the steps.
My youngest teen decided to accompany me on a work trip the other day. I had been asked to speak at a rally at a bus stop on a national tour for Paid Leave For All. She has spent a month away this summer, and I thought since her sister was attending band camp and working that it would be a great chance for some quality one-on-one time. She had slept until about 20 minutes before we left. We had made plans for the speech, dinner, and cooling off at the hotel before a night of live music at a festival while we were in town. We hadn’t planned on her fainting from the heat at the rally.
Thankfully, she was standing in a group of folks who I’ve partnered with for work consistently over the years, and one of them sprung right into action. She was back to herself soon enough, but it was quite the scare for all of us. And it was a reminder that we don’t know what’s going to happen from minute to minute.
The kiddo was talking about it in the car and said that she was lucky she hadn’t hit her head on the concrete stairs. My mom-brain had already gone there, and I agreed. Then I started thinking about how badly that could have gone. We were three hours away from home, first of all. I would have had to learn where I was and the way things worked there. And then the fact that it happened while I was talking about paid leave … well … isn’t that a bit ironic?
My eighth- grade year ended with my grandfather (Pop) and grandma living with us. It wasn’t because they wanted to but because they had to. Pop had Alzheimers, which was hardly heard of then, and it was too hard for my grandma to take care of him by herself. We placed a hospital bed in the dining room and we all pitched in. My great aunts even came from time to time to help. My mom and stepdad worked and my brother and I would help grandma after school. My family would have benefited greatly from paid leave because they worked low-wage jobs with no benefits, such as paid time off or FMLA.
Years later, my stepdad was involved in an accident while working as a security guard. He was life-flighted to a hospital over an hour away. The doctors told my mother that they would take it minute by minute. He spent nine months hospitalized before finally coming home. My mom’s co-workers donated their leave to her, but, eventually, it was a struggle to pay the bills. Paid leave would have helped so much.
We hear a lot about workforce participation and people needing to work, but we need to hear more about the barriers that exist for that to happen. Building an infrastructure in this country centered around care would make a huge difference in our lives. We need paid family leave, childcare, home and community care, to name a few so we can have a strong foundation to build from.
Did you know that out of 41 countries, the United States is the only one that doesn’t mandate paid maternity leave? How, in the richest country in the world, is that even allowed? What has kept us from raising hell about that until it is changed? We have mothers giving birth and heading back to work within days. That isn’t serving the mother or the child well.
You aren’t allowed to lift anything heavier than your newborn for six weeks after a c-section. You aren’t allowed to drive for six weeks after a c-section. Yet women are made to return to work so they can financially survive, and they can’t even drive themselves there! And don’t even get me started on how it is to breastfeed under these conditions.
A mother shouldn’t have to leave her newborn to work. A mother shouldn’t have to leave her child’s side at the hospital. A wife shouldn’t be forced to make choices about her spouse. And dads should be able to take time off, too, because of family matters.
We can do better, and this might be the best chance we have. Call your senators. Tell them to pass Paid Leave For All.
Onward,
Amy Jo
