She had two sick kids at home. They were vomiting and didn’t want anything to eat or drink. Standing in line at the grocery store, she watched the woman in front of her sweat while waiting for the cashier to ring up her cart full of items.
She could tell by watching her that she was nervous. Then she noticed that as she swiped her EBT card with her right hand, the fingers on her left hand, clutching her pant leg, were tightly crossed. She watched that woman silently pray that her card still had funds on it and noted that her own eyes teared up as the cashier asked if she wanted the receipt in a bag.
She silently watched what had gone on while clutching the bag of popsicles to her chest and released a sigh of her own when the woman’s card worked.
It was her turn at the register, and she whispered to the cashier, “This is SNAP.” The cashier responded with a nod of her head. There was no idle chit-chat or even a “Hi” or “How are you?” The cashier rang up the popsicles and said, “Swipe your card.” The woman behind her in line said to the cashier, “Must be nice to pay for junk food with food stamps. Must have already got the steak and lobster. I wish someone else would pay for my groceries.”
She felt her face redden and her eyes begin to burn. She snatched the receipt out of the cashier’s hand, turned, and flipped off the woman behind her in line. She walked as fast as she could to her car, and she cried all the way home.
Sore Throat Relief
That popsicle mom was me. I was doing what I needed to do for my sick kids. I was using my SNAP to pay for popsicles that I knew my kids would eat and that would keep them hydrated. If she would have asked, I would have explained because that’s what non-poor folks with mean and judgmental comments make poor folks want to do. There’s this never-ending feeling that you’re expected to prove your character. I didn’t want to be stereotyped as “one of those” poor people who didn’t work; the “Welfare Queen” from the Ronald Reagan days was not me.
But instead, my fight or flight kicked in and I ran away to cry in my car after my middle finger was thrown at her.
Now, in the state of West Virginia, funding has been received from the Families First Coronavirus Response Act and the USDA, allowing each school-age child who receives free or reduced meals to receive approximately $313 for food. The funds will be disbursed to guardians on Pandemic Electronic Benefits Transfer Cards, P-EBT. Over 230,000 West Virginia kids will receive this benefit. Here in my county, and 42 other counties statewide, every school-aged child will receive the benefit, regardless of income, because the entire county school system qualifies for free meals. I was moved to tears when I first heard about this because I know the need crosses socioeconomic lines, and yet …
The Ignorance
I am reading hundreds of comments from non-SNAP folks about how “people” will sell the cards for drugs. I’m hearing that “certain people” need to be given lists of allowed food. I am hearing about how people wished “everyone” would use the card the way it’s supposed to be used. But what I’m not hearing them say is that they’re thankful.
I’m also not hearing them say that maybe their neighbor should be checked on because she has quite the sweet tooth and might spend her food money on baking supplies. In fact, I’m not hearing them make assumptions about anyone from their social circle.
No one is going to be questioning non-SNAP recipients about the use of an iPhone and a P-EBT. No one is going to make comments about how that free government food is being loaded into a new car. No one will talk crap about a bag of chips or a package of steak in a P-EBT cart. No one is going to question a non-poor folk’s manicured hand while it’s swiping the P-EBT card, and yet poor folks have to digest that mess.
All. The. Time.
I asked on a Facebook post who wanted to go with me to the grocery store and judge the upper-middle-class folks when these cards were distributed, and wow! I was told that I was ostracizing folks, judging, stereotyping, and being no different than those people who make such comments. Imagine if I would talk about (female name) from (wealthy neighborhood)’s pill problem and state that I hope she uses the card to feed her kids and not sell it for dope!
Walls Within the System
Here’s the rub: we’re being shown that the systems in place aren’t designed to help people sustain themselves. From layoffs to low wage earnings, we’re given a glimpse as to how volatile our financial health is now. Poverty isn’t always about poor choices and bad decisions. Oftentimes, it’s created by systemic barriers, and we’re scared to admit that maybe “certain people” are no different than us. It’s easier to hide behind false stereotypes and deceitful rhetoric.
I hope that minds are opened with every swipe of those P-EBT cards. I hope that we can be honest with ourselves about our financial situations and realize that the embarrassment, fear, and shame that comes with government assistance is ridiculous and uncalled for. I hope that maybe we’ll start to view poverty as a circumstance and not a personality defect, and that maybe, just maybe, the next time we see someone crossing their fingers and silently praying their card has funds to cover the groceries, we’ll pray with them and not find it necessary to judge their phone or purse or popsicle flavor.
Stay well. Check out your assumptions and not the shopping cart next to you.
Onward,
Amy Jo
