Even though there are thousands of adjectives describing everything we know, see, smell, feel, touch, and believe, one must be most careful when selected the terms to define her.
“Tough” is nearly automatic because of the figurative bumps and bruises endured, but there are also soft sides when it comes to love, endearment, and compassion, and the same circumstance is presented when explaining a wide angle of creativity because of the options chosen and the options left idled and inferior.
“Intelligent” is an easy one, right? But how so? Intuitive is a given, sure, but what about book smart and street smart and well, being a smartass because, let’s be honest, those all are true, too. And, of course, there are those other sides that include a human’s natural yearn and the way females feel differently.
“Driven” is another term that expresses a portion of the person who is Joelle Moray, but is it a fair word? Is “determined” more appropriate? Maybe even “motivated” or “inspired? Or should it just be said that Moray is an “achiever”? Or, hey, what about a “conqueror”?
That has a “winning” ring to it, now, doesn’t it?
OK, one more attempt. How about “fantabulous”? Sure, it’s an invented-combination-of-words word, but it sure covers a lot of adjectiveous territory that ventures where no description has ever gone before. Yup, for certain, “fantabulous” is exactamoondoe-lly perfect for the successful, caring, and sweet person Joelle Moray is.
You’ve always been a very motived individual in your professional career, and then you decided to resign from a “big job with a corporation” to follow a new counseling career. Why?
I thought about going to graduate school for music therapy about twenty years ago when I was in undergraduate school. I abandoned that dream for many reasons back then. The little voice to become a therapist nudged at me every few years or so.
I finally decided it was time to listen and to go after my passion. While I’ve had a tremendous career for which I’m very grateful, I am now following my true calling. There is an enormous need for more therapists in the field now more than ever. If anyone reading this has ever contemplated this line of work, please pursue it. We need you!
What are the best – and worst (if any) – parts of being an adoptive mother?
The best parts are the same as with any parenting. There is simply no greater joy than having a toddler run to you with wide open arms yelling, “Mommmmmy!” Or watching the wonder in their eyes as they explore their world. Or when they learn something new.
There are several challenging parts about being an adoptive parent. Not knowing how adoption is going to affect them when they’re older. I want to make sure we find the right language to properly convey their stories to them. Will they have feelings of abandonment, questions of identity, and social and emotional challenges related to race?
One of the children is mixed-race; it is a tremendous (and wonderful) responsibility to raise a child who is a different race than you. We intentionally take great care to learn, listen, gather resources, and reach out to people who are the same race as her so that we make sure we are providing her with the right tools she needs to thrive. We continually learn from adult adoptees, as well.
Another piece of adoption that is different than having biological children is not experiencing rites-of-passage such as baby showers, gender reveal parties, getting to have fun ways to announce to our parents that we’re expecting. However, we have our own stories that are equally emotional (in good ways!) for these things.
For example, I will never forget getting those two phone calls that changed our lives forever (one for each kid). I will never forget telling our families about them. I will never forget the day my daughter was born (I was in the room). My incredibly amazing friends created “the nursery squad” in lieu of a traditional baby shower.
It was the most incredible outpouring of love I’ve ever experienced.
Why did you make the decision several years ago to remain a resident of the Upper Ohio Valley?
I, like many others, left a few times and came back a few times. The valley is robust with culture, outdoor recreation, entertainment, education, not to mention it’s safe and affordable. It has challenges like any other place; and it’s also pretty fabulous in a lot of ways, too.
As a former singer, what songs did you enjoy performing the most, and why?
Me & Bobby McGee by Janis Joplin, Right Through You by Alanis Morrisette, Carnival by Natalie Merchant, and Stay by Lisa Loeb.
I love all things that fall into the category of singer-songwriter such as Carole King, Fleetwood Mac, James Taylor, Paul Simon, and Joni Mitchell. I auditioned to be a music major in undergraduate school with Big Yellow Taxi by Joni Mitchell, while other kids auditioned with Mozart and Bach. I got in, but I think they just didn’t know what to do with me!
I love singing songs that make me feel something or think of someone or a place I’ve traveled to or an ideal. I simply cannot play, sing, or dance to a song that I don’t connect with emotionally. I think I hear music and experience lyrics differently than other people. I analyze and embody song lyrics the way some people experience poetry or art. I pick up the nuances and subtleties on a deep emotional level. It’s transcendental.
Every Sunday when I cook the big family meal, you can bet there is some sort of music playing.
What do you see, as far as the future, for the Wheeling area?
Wheeling has undergone more change in the last decade than at any other time I can remember. It’s exciting and vibrant. There’s an energy here.
I see the future of the city as a place where people embrace and appreciate all the area has to offer, where leaders think outside the box and take creative risks to challenging problems, and where our children are proud to call home.
