When I was in third grade a boy named Danny called me Dolly Parton. All through elementary school, I was called Morticia Addams. In eighth grade after sneak peeks at their dads’ porn stashes, the boys started calling me Wanda.
In college, I was Kimba and CJ. People have been calling me names they thought suited me most of my life.
But instead of getting mad, hurt or experiencing some other negative reaction to the nicknames, I owned that ish. Dolly Parton doesn’t take crap for anyone and neither do I. Morticia had a dry, sarcastic sense of humor and that fit me too. I thought the Wanda nickname was so cool I used it as my first professional media name and my first Yahoo email address.
I have a few friends who still call me Kimba and some of you might remember CJ Roebukk as part of Metal Tuesdays on WGLZ, the student radio station at West Liberty University. I live by the motto, “It’s not what they call you, it’s what you answer to that counts.”
So, I either embrace it or ignore it. And yes, there have been plenty of names I’ve ignored.
At this point you’re wondering, “Okay, this is interesting and all, but what does any of it have to do with the Wheeling Suspension Bridge?” Well, I needed to provide some backstory. You see, I have recently been bestowed with a new nickname and I wanted to share it with you:
Hi, I’m “Bridge Bitch.” Nice to meet you.
This all started when I began expressing my concern about vehicles crossing the Suspension Bridge that were over the posted weight limit. I commented on posts about it, made a few posts of my own on Facebook about the issue and would yell, “Too big!” out my car window at large trucks and SUVs that passed me on the bridge.
But most of that went unnoticed until the video. I went on Facebook Live filming oversized cars, trucks and SUVs crossing the bridge. It made a lot of tongues wag and I received a decent amount of support. But I also got some backlash.
One of my most ardent detractors decided to dub me “Bridge Bitch.” He was trying to insult me. Swing and a miss, dude. Swing. And. A. Miss. But more about that later, right now, let’s discuss the bridge.
I have an issue with both drivers and our state and local governments regarding the bridge. Let’s start with the signage: Hey, WVDOH, why in the world do you think it’s sufficient to place signs on the entrances of both sides of the bridge and nowhere else leading up to the bridge? There should be a sign at the intersection where I-70 exit ramps into downtown Wheeling on the city side and several signs on South Penn, and Virginia Street on the Island side.
Once vehicles get to the bridge on either side, there is nowhere to easily turn around and I can’t tell you how many drivers I’ve seen take a deep breath and drive across it knowing full well they’re over the limit but feeling like they don’t have a choice. More signs warning people would help.
In my not-so-humble opinion, closing the bridge was a cop-out on the part of WVDOH. The bridge has needed repairs and improvements for years.
“We’re closing it next year for repairs” has been the DOH’s mantra for over five years. Now, after not one, but two passenger buses crossed the span, the second causing “minor structural damage” (if you call a damaged cable minor), the bridge has been closed indefinitely. Any questions about when the repairs are going to be made go unanswered.
Representatives of the WVDOH skip meetings with Island residents. No one will return repeated phone calls.
Meanwhile, those of us who live on the Island spend a ridiculous amount of time getting off the Island just to get to the other traffic tie-ups happening in the city. At least some of you in other parts of Wheeling get to travel a few miles before you’re stuck in the traffic quagmire. For me and other Island residents, it starts at the top of our street.
Also, drivers: do you have any idea how much your vehicle weighs? The information is on the sticker on the driver’s side door. There’s also a weight on your registration card. I’m willing to bet your vehicle weighs more than you think it does. Here are a few examples of vehicle weights:
2013 Chevy Malibu 3,393lbs
2013 Ford Taurus 4,037lbs
2017 Chevy Silverado 4,979lbs
2000 Dodge Ram 1500 4,841lbs
2014 KIA Optima 3,496lbs
2013 Buick Regal 3,600lbs
Keep in mind, these are just the weight of your vehicle as it rolled out of the factory. It does not include you, your spouse, the kids, Fido, Fluffy, the 22 bags of groceries from Kroger, the car jack, spare tire or the sled from your father’s storage shed that brings back nightmares of winters when you were a kid.
So, let’s do some quick math. Let’s say you have a 2013 Chevy Malibu, a spouse, two kids, and a dog. It’s a typical Saturday. On the way home from the vet, you and your spouse head to Lowe’s to grab some stuff for some home projects. Then you stop at Kroger because you need some groceries. Then you pick up one kid from dance class and the other from soccer practice. Now you’re heading home.
Chevy Malibu 3,393lbs
You: 130lbs
Spouse: 200lbs
Kid #1 100lbs
Kid #2 110lbs
The dog 30lbs
Groceries from Kroger and stuff from Lowe’s 20lbs
Spare tire and jack 35lbs
Total 4,018lbs
You are over the 2-ton weight limit for the Suspension Bridge. Now, obviously, if you take away any one of the above-listed items, you’re fine. But it’s just something to consider the next time you cross that bridge. If it ever reopens.
And it needs to reopen. Without the Suspension Bridge, there is only one way off the Wheeling Island going East, the I-70 East on-ramp from Zane Street. But thanks to the bridge project going on the interstate entrance is often a parking lot. So, that means many of us go west instead, crossing into Ohio and looping around on Marion St. to get on I-70 East.
This might all seem like first world problems, but it’s a bigger issue than that. When the river rises, the Island floods, and that sometimes includes Zane Street and the I-70 on-ramp. The other end of Zane also floods, cutting off access to the bridge to Ohio. So, if the Bridgeport Bridge is inaccessible and the on-ramp to the interstate is underwater, how do we escape?
The bottom line is, Island residents need the Wheeling Suspension Bridge. Not just for walkers and bicycles, but for cars. Even with the weight limit, there are still plenty of vehicles that can safely cross the bridge. Several plausible ideas to control traffic have been presented, all of which got shot down for one reason or another.
So, Wheeling government and WVDOH, get your acts together and make this happen because we could quickly go from moderate to great inconvenience to a possible disaster with one heavy rainfall or some other natural disaster.
Reopen the bridge.
And guess what? If and when the bridge reopens, I’ll STILL be yelling at oversized cars, SUVs and trucks driving over the span, and I’ll still post on social media about it. I’ll continue not to care what you have to say about it because it’s my right to point these things out.
No amount of name calling is going to change that.
Go ahead and call me, “Bridge Bitch.” I don’t care. Hell, I’ll don a, “Bridge Bitch” t-shirt, because that’s how I roll.
And I’d like to do so in my car across the Suspension Bridge.
