This should be a happy time for Johnet Hager and many parents like her.

Her daughter, RaeLynn, was just graduated from high school. She’s ready to leave the nest and head off to college.

The family celebrated to be sure, giving her daughter her just due as she reached and achieved one of life’s more memorable milestones.

But these memories are forever tainted; their elation is tempered with sadness, a desire to celebrate stifled with bouts of disappointment and anger.

The murder of George Floyd while unarmed and in Minneapolis police custody is just another in the long line of people of color—not just men—that have been unceremoniously removed from existence by law enforcement.

Are all cops bad? No. But it’s obvious there’s a problem.

Names like Floyd, Sean Reed, David McAtee, Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor, an EMT who was shot in her own home, ring loudly in the consciousness.

Floyd’s life was extinguished with an officer’s knee pressed firmly to his neck as the 46-year-old uttered “I can’t breathe” as his life was extinguished.

Recall back to 2014, when Eric Garner uttered those very same words as he was choked to death on Staten Island by an NYPD officer.

This is the dual role that Hager must play for her daughter.

She must prepare for life as an adult, instilling a work ethic and desire to learn and to better herself, so that when her daughter makes it to college and beyond, she’s ready to conquer the world.

But there’s another lesson that she must teach, one that is unique to Black parents and the Black experience.

That is how to live in a world where racial inequality and the threat of police brutality and/or harassment are not just talking points, but a reality.

Hager is pictured with the two most important people in her life; her longtime partner, Guy, and her daughter, RaeLynn.

What is an injustice that you’ve been subjected to individually?

An injustice that I experienced is a time when I can think of (which was difficult because most times I avoid situations where I could see me being treated unjustly). A time I can think of was when I went to a car dealership. I took my car, but he hadn’t taken a look at it. It was old and had been in a few fender benders. Also, I had my African American friend from Philadelphia with me. The salesman was very condescending talking to us. He told me I really needed a vehicle, and I should just take anything because it would be better than what I was driving at the time. Now did that happen because two black women walked in there? We immediately left because how did he know it was my car; he just assumed. Possibly because we were women or a double whammy a black woman. Double jeopardy is what I’ve heard it has been called.

How do you feel when you see/experience law enforcement? How do you handle a situation where you are experiencing inequality?

As far as law enforcement goes, I just feel nervous to say any of my opinions around them. If I get stopped for a traffic violation, I follow the words of the movie “The Hate You Give”—hands on the dashboard and no sudden moves. That was a great movie to explain a lot of the injustices we face. I handle these circumstances by fact-checking them. This situation isn’t great, but hopefully brings a lot of awareness to what is happening to Black lives. It’s time for us to come out of the 1940s and let us be free and treated equally.

How would you describe your feelings about current events?

My current feelings are just sadness and disappointment. Sadness for my brothers’ and sisters’ lives. My nephews, my child, brothers, cousins, etc … just because their skin is brown like mine. Disappointment in the morals and thoughts of the people who are doing these actions and committing brutality against people. You think people would think it’s not this person’s fault that they were born with this skin color, so I should treat them all the same. If you’re a bad cop, judge, or someone who has control over another person’s livelihood, one should consider that. Morally it’s only right. 

Why do you think some people don’t understand the #BlackLivesMatter movement?

I think people don’t understand the movement simply because of the entitlement that was natured or nurtured into them. It’s about the ones who are saying “all lives matter” and think the movement is not including them, but my life is what is in trouble at this time. It’s because of my skin color (which is black) that it appears to be a threat. 

RaeLynn is set to head off to college in the fall. Her mother and family have helped prepare her not only for academia, but also for the realities of life as a Black American.

Ask a Black woman, and a parent, how difficult is it to not only have to endure this situation repeatedly but also having to watch your daughter go through it and react to the injustice and work through her feelings each time?

It’s tough. I cry more and more that this is happening. I have been telling her about things like this, but she didn’t get it until she was able to mentally process it. She just told me of a situation she had in middle school that she didn’t tell me about at the time because she didn’t want me to go to the school and start something. She knew my mind would’ve been going there.  I’m tired of this situation happening again and again. I won’t stop teaching her or showing